Do you ever feel like giving up?--giving up on the diet,--giving up on trying to clean your house,--giving up on trying to teach your kids to be nice--just plain giving up--I wonder how many mothers out there have those kind of days?...
Today was one of those days...I have been super stressed these last few months and have not been able to blog because of it. I go to bed every night super tired from the day mentally and physically( now that I am working out lol)
About a month ago Parker started crying uncontrollably and getting really bad stomach aches when he had to go to school..he swore he was sick and insisted I take him to the doctor, so I did and all the doc said was to give him some stuff for his tummy and it might make the anxiety go away...excuse me! ANXIETY! I did not want to believe her that my son was already starting the sicko effects of this stupid anxiety stuff! It runs on my side of the family and also on Matthew's side of the family so I guess some of my kids are bound to have to deal right?! I have just seen a lot of what it does to people and it just makes me so mad and sad that he is going to have to deal with it the rest of his life! I mean I know that everyone gets anxious but not every one makes themselves sick every single day just with the thoughts of going out..I do not have any experience with this so it has been very stressful for me...I sometimes just want to hide in my room for hours and hope it is better when I get out..but its not ,,,,I have researched a lot about children and their stresses and I know that parents are the key to a successful child learning to deal with their problems...I have seen the psychiatrist at his school and she has been VERY helpful with this new thing:)! I had no idea that schools have such incredible people to help us parents!! I have been doing a rewards system with him that has been working fairly well..if he goes to school without throwing a fit he gets a quarter and if he reads his daily reading book assignment without throwing a fit he gets another quarter. He usually earns about a dollar a week.. he at least does not get stomach aches as much but his little heart just races when he has to go to school or to his church class.
He has also developed this HUGE fear of dying or his body falling apart. This last Sunday at my mom's house her dog started gagging on a hairball and Parker started crying and came running in the house saying "He is dying! He is just going to die!" and was just sobbing...I had to calm him down and explain why dogs get hairballs...anyway this is just a small amount of the things we have been dealing with any suggestions would be appreciated I do not want to put him on medicine so I need all the help I can get! :)On a positive note I did make cheese cake tonight that was FABULOUS!
3 comments:
Poor Parker. Anxiety sucks, but it sounds like you are working on it in an effective way rather than taking the Andy approach and saying "get over it". :D You are a good mom! Your kids are lucky to have you. Don't give up on things just take breaks every once in a while. And invite friends ((HINT HINT)) over to chat when you make good cheese cake!
I feel like giving up ALL the time! Life is hard. But don't let that get you down. It's supposed to be that way! If it was easy we wouldn't grow. Like you always say, that's HIS trial in life lol. Just turn to the Lord and teach him to do the same :)
You are an INCREDIBLE Mother, Steph! One of the things I love about you is that you have a way of explaining things to your kids. You are calm. Parker NEEDS to see/hear/feel that calm from you when he feels this anxiety. It's terrifying stuff! I know! He doesn't know how to deal with it either and if he could hide in his room for hours to avoid it, he would! I think you are already finding answers and are being led to those who can help you. As he deals with his anxiety young and as you help him "fight his dragon", it will become easier for him to deal with it! You are doing a great job and don't feel guilty for being frustrated with it and for sometimes feeling like you just can't deal with it. That is a normal feeling. Take a break and then dive right back in to doing what you do best, being a fabulous Mom!
If it were me I would research all kinds of books at the library, and just start teaching him about everything...especially his body and how it works. More importantly teach him about the Lord and afterlife and how wonderful it is...and that when it is time to die, it isn't a scary thing! I'm sure you are doing all those things as well. There is nothing more scary than the fear of the unknown, so help him know :)
I totally feel like giving up EVERY DAY! This Mom of 5 thing is srsly HARD! Thank you for your heartfelt post, it helps me to know I am not the only one!
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